Surviving China: A Playlist

The best advice I got before I came to China for the year was to take my iPod and headphones everywhere I go. It’s kind of a no-brainer in light of my love for music, but the root of the advice is that when you’re walking along, doing your thing, living in China after a few weeks and you don’t see any English or hear any English or see anyone who looks anything like you, at least there is familiar music playing in your ears. I’ve really taken this to heart. When I take off each morning on my walk to class, I put my music on. I do the same on the walk back. In the car on the way to wherever I’m going, on the train. I keep my music going pretty much anytime I am not in conversation with someone or in my apartment.

I have a lot of music. I’m not in the top tier of music owners. I know some fanatics who have 50,000 songs or more. I am coming in at around 8000 these days, but I think that’s substantial. I’ve learned that with so much music, playlists are essential. I could spend days and days organizing my music, and often, I do. No one wants to listen to The Who right after Amy Grant. Or a song from Rent next to a Frank Sinatra. Okay, so those are not at all an adequate sampling of my music...just for the record.

A few days ago I decided to check out to see what I’ve played the most while here in China, and I assembled a playlist called “Surviving China.” Since I’m almost done here, I thought I’d share a few songs with you, with no, vague, or way too detailed explanations. Oh, and don’t judge me, you might be surprised what you choose to listen to when you spend a year alone in a foreign country.

Fleetwood Mac/Stevie Nicks-Dreams, Gypsy, The Chain

I recently rediscovered Fleetwood Mac. I was one of those people in college who kinda went back and forth on Stevie’s voice, then in California when my love for Joni Mitchell tripled, I think Stevie got ushered in too. I started listening more and more, and by the time Glee did their Rumours episode, I was a legit fan. I know, late in the game, but I also know lots of people who have this same story about Stevie. Anyway, I find myself going back to the above songs this year. Turning them on feels very grounding, almost like putting roots down. And that’s something that I’ve needed this year. I feel like I could float away sometimes and no one would know or notice. These songs have helped with that feeling. “I have no fear, I have only love.”

Ingrid Michaelson-Keep Breathing

A Promise To Keep-Brandi Carlile

Brandi Carlile-A Promise To Keep

Natalie Merchant-Kind and Generous 

Remembering to be thankful throughout this year has been hard in my worst moments. I get lonely, a little depressed, and find myself wanting to blame someone, ANYONE, for not being there for me. For this not being easier. For so many things. But this song is grounding and when I stop naval-gazing for 2 seconds and look around at the people in my life, the opportunities I’ve had, I cannot be anything but thankful. 

Sarah McLachlan-Hold On 

Damien Rice-Delicate 

David Gray-Babylon

I just love the line, “The love that I was, giving you was, never in doubt.” Love his voice, love the song, brings back great light memories and makes me feel somehow hopeful too.

John Mayer-Say, 3x5 

All At Sea-Jamie Cullum

Jamie Cullum-All At Sea

Coldplay-Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall, Us Against The World, Swallowed in the Sea

I am a total geek when it comes to Coldplay. I love them. I just do. These three are a good sampling for me here. The upbeat anthem, the super slow and sweet love song, and the quiet but building with the greatest lines, “Oh what good is it to live? With nothing left to give? Forget, but not forgive...not loving all you see!?” I have taken those words as a personal challenge this year. 

Van Morrison-Into The Mystic

Elvis Costello-Hoover Factory

The National-About Today

The song from The Fighter that still haunts me when I hear it. It’s soothing and melancholy, but ultimately has a slow steady beat with good instrumentation, the words are sad, but I like them that way.

Pearl Jam-Just Breathe

One Republic-Good Life

Mumford & Sons-Hopeless Wanderer, White Blank Page

The Weepies-World Spins Madly On

If you are not familiar with this song, you should get that way soon. It’s a really simple song, with great words and truth behind it. It gives me a resigned/content feeling. It is what it is, the world stops for no one.

Gotye-Somebody That I Used To Know

Things To Say-SafetySuit

SafetySuit-Things To Say

Spencer and Antfood-Trek

This song was from a commercial on Hulu and it hooked me every time. I love the name of it. Feels very appropriate to where I am right now.

Fun.-We Are Young

Linkin Park-Waiting For The End

And of course...

The Cure-Pictures of You

I already blogged on this one...check it out here.

What songs have kept you going during 
tough or unusual times?

Part 1: Defining Music

I was out for a walk today, listening to my most recently assembled playlist entitled "Wanderlust" when a song came on that I haven't heard in a while. It took me back immediately to a very defining moment in my life. I love how music does that. So I thought I'd take this opportunity to write about some of the music that's defined my life. 

The song that played today on my walk was Linkin Park's "Waiting For The End." I discovered this song in January of 2011, which was the month before I left Fresno. It became the song that represented my move from California back to Alabama. The lyrics are great, and I sang them with tears pouring down my face as I waved bye to my three best friends and let my mom drive me out of the city. "So I'm picking up the pieces now where to begin, the hardest part of ending is starting again." Truer words have never been spoken.

There are a few artists that I could name as important at every turn, Sarah Mclachlan and Coldplay are two of those. Sarah McLachlan's album, Afterglow, became the album of my last six months in New Orleans for a variety of reasons. At the time, songs like "Push" and "Answer" seemed to fit, but looking back "Trainwreck," "Stupid," and "Dirty Little Secret" are much more applicable. The song that is the most representative is "Fallen." The lyrics say, "But it's one missed step and slip before you know it, and there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed." Oh the irony of feeling in desperate need of redemption as I graduated from seminary!

Maybe the best soundtrack of the past decade...or maybe ever, is that of Garden State. I think I played it every single time I climbed into my maroon XTERRA for the entire year I lived in Nashville during 2004-2005. It's a mellow album with lots of heavy songs, but lots of hope too. Iron and Wine's version of "Such Great Heights," Frou Frou's "Let Go," and Remy Zero's "Fair" are all incredible. It also features The Shins, Coldplay, Nick Drake, and Cary Brothers. But Simon and Garfunkel's "The Only Living Boy In New York" is my favorite, and for that time horrible year in Nashville, I felt like the only living person there, and that song (and soundtrack) gave me what I needed to get through it. "I get the news I need on the weather report...Hey, I've got nothing to do today but smile."

In the fall of 2010 I was finishing up my MFA thesis. The thesis was basically the story of my developing (and at times, deteriorating) faith. I spent a few days on the California coast near Santa Cruz in a place called Capitola/Aptos. I spent the time writing like crazy trying to finish chapter after chapter, and the entire time I listened to the song, "Ocean" by Bebo Norman. I was introduced to Bebo in 2000 by my friend Leslie, and have been a fan since. This particular song was inspiring and worshipful and comforting for me, exactly what I needed for that project. But to this day, I cannot hear it without picturing the little town of Capitola and the thousands of words I put down during those days. "You are an ocean, and I can get lost in the first wind on my shore." Because of having it on replay for that time, it remains the most played song in my iTunes.

As I mentioned before, a Coldplay song could really be named to represent almost every turn, every emotion, and every event of my last ten years. This particular song has kind of become my anthem for forgiveness. The older I get, the more people let me down, or just flat out hurt me. I guess it's bound to happen as we grow and experience more. We just rub against each other in hurtful ways. My mom says this shapes me. She calls it "heavenly sandpaper." She's good like that. The worst part about being hurt is that the people who hurt you the most are usually the ones you don't get the apology from. It's a hard lesson, and one that forces you to find inward peace. The song, "Death and All His Friends" is one the song that soothes my anger and want for vindication more than any other. Not only is the music fantastic (of course), but the lyrics (though few) are perfect. "No I don't want a battle from beginning to end, I don't want to cycle or recycle revenge, I don't want to follow death and all his friends." It puts me at ease every time. 


I will write a few more of these blogs in time, as there is no way I could limit defining music to just these! But I'll let you digest these few and consider your own defining music. 

Is there a defining song that represents a moment or period of time for you? Tell me about it!