Kill Your Darlings or The One With All The Spoilers

Some people think it was Whitman, others Stephen King...but I think William Faulkner said it first. "In writing, you must kill all your darlings." And that's what this blog is all about, kind of...TV Deaths.

Such a darling, they had to bring him back.

I will be giving away spoilers. Lots of them. I will do my best to label each section of the blog with what shows I am discussing in order to spare you in case you are not caught up.

If killing your darlings makes for good writing, these next shows did it up right. Some deaths were shocking, others we saw coming, but all of them were devastating.

Who Died 

Spoilers for The Walking Dead, Downton Abbey (Season 3), 90210, Six Feet Under, Game of Thrones, Dexter, Desperate Housewives, ER, Lost, Grey's Anatomy, Buffy The Vampire Slayer:

ER-Dr. Green-He was the heartbeat of the show, and I stopped watching ER when he died. Consequently, I can never hear that version of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" the same way again.
Game of Thrones-Eddard Stark-I thought the entire show was going to center around him! And it did. Until it didn't.
LOST-Charlie, Sun, Jin-A lot of people died on this show (eventually most of them). But these three deaths were particularly tough to watch. Charlie's heroic death showed the evolution of his rock star character beautifully. While losing Sun and Jin was just sad because of how their love grew and changed while on the island.
Grey's Anatomy-Lexie, McSteamy, Denny, Henry-Gosh, the list of deaths on this show is a little alarming. I didn't even name them all. But these were a few of the "darlings." We've discussed in detail the most recent deaths, but two of the most shocking for me were Denny and the more recent, Henry. Both were so loved and both came as kind of a surprise, keeping true love and happiness away from both Izzie and Teddy.

This was seriously shocking.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer-Tara, Buffy's Mom-Tara's death in this show made me cry harder than any death I've ever seen on a show before. It is maybe one of the most shocking deaths I've ever seen. And the way the show explored grief in light of Buffy's mom's death was brilliant and heartbreaking. Way to go Joss Whedon!
Downton Abbey-Sybil- Yep. Talk about killing a darling. I won't give more details, since this is not even common knowledge in America yet...but it's a tough one.
The Walking Dead-Lori-I knew either Lori or the baby had to go, and no one wants to see a baby die, so...naturally it had to be her. The way it happened was pretty rough and will no doubt have a lasting effect on Carl, and even Rick who has been an asshole to her all season.
Six Feet Under-Nate-A death has never angered me as much as this one. I think because of who he was with when it happened...I always held out hope for him and Brenda. Thank God he reincarnated as Adam Braverman.

There's a lot of death represented in this picture.

Dexter-Rita-I didn't see it coming until Dexter was walking into his house. The episode should have been over. And then it hit me....Rita. And it was just so horrifying.
Desperate Housewives-Mike-Why on earth couldn't the writers let Mike live! When he was shot on that porch, I couldn't believe that Susan was going to end up alone again. I mean...so much angst!
90210-Scott-This might be the first death that surprised me on TV. Scott wasn't a main character, but he was innocent and sweet and David's friend. When he accidentally shot himself, I couldn't believe it had actually happened. Of course the episode was agenda driven with a gun safety message, but it was still pretty eye opening for my teenage self at the time.

These next shows tried to trick us. Maybe they came to the brink but chickened out, maybe ratings plummeted, whatever the reason, these are some shows that almost killed someone off.

Who Almost/Seemingly Died

Spoilers for Glee, Dallas, Revenge, Grey's Anatomy, Lost

Glee-Quinn-Texting and driving isn't always fatal.
Dallas-Bobby-Turning entire seasons of TV shows into dreams.
Revenge-Victoria-So the plane crash that supposedly killed her, didn't.
Grey's Anatomy-Meredith-She did technically die, but aside from giving us some insight into her dark and twisty brain, this moment mostly served the show by jumping the shark.
Lost-Juliet-This woman had 9 lives. She kept getting in situations that should have killed her, but managed to hold out for a while before actually biting the bullet.

Oh, I thought I was watching Grey's not Lost...oh, wait, what?

These next shows have/had potential to rock our worlds. Here's a few ideas of how I think they could/should do it.

Who Needs To Die/Should Have Died

There are no spoilers here, only speculations.

Glee-Quinn-For all of Glee's hard hitting agendas, they sure did let up on this one pretty easily. Think about it. It wouldn't have been that horrible to kill her off. I mean, I like Quinn, I actually like her a lot. Which is THE WHOLE POINT. She's a darling! If you want to teach kids not to text and drive, do more than put her in a wheelchair for a few weeks. Let's see how Mr. Shue comes up with the appropriate funeral songs...or better yet, let's just all be silent for a minute and reflect on the seriousness of Quinn dying because of a stupid text message.
Revenge-Nolan or Jack-If you really want to kill a darling, these two need to go. Raise the stakes a little here and let's see what happens to Emily and Amanda with Jack out of the picture. Who has Emily's back once Nolan is dead. It's time for something drastic to happen. I don't want Victoria dead because if that ever happens (and it has to with a title like Revenge), it has to be at the hands of Emily.

Like this, only at the end.

Dexter-Dexter or Deb-I'm less than thrilled with this season of Dexter, I always thought the show should END with a confrontation between Dexter and Deb, which would be awesome and terrifying and just...epic. But here we are. I believe that either Dexter or Deb must die, and preferably one will kill the other. I know that's pretty hard hitting, but if you want us to take it seriously, then it has to be serious.
Criminal Minds-Reid or Garcia-The thing about crime shows is that they can just keep going and going. But this one actually has a good character arc within the week to week case solving. Reid and Garcia are the ones we love the most and their deaths would no doubt shake up the show. I think Reid could be on the chopping block for this season...
SVU-Olivia-Without Olivia, there is no SVU now that Stabler's gone. But statistics alone show that being the primary officer for 14 years on 304 cases (and those are just the ones we get to see on TV) Olivia would probably be hurt if not killed by now.

Which TV death made you cry, shocked you, or made you relieved? Who would you like to see killed off?

What I am ACTUALLY Watching

I've decided to tell you what I am actually watching, since we all go back and forth about TV so much on this blog. These are not in order of importance or favorite at all. They are kind of in order by genre if anything. If you are watching a show you want covered on the blog, then feel free to write up a post and send it to me at catidwell222@gmail.com I'd love more writers and more input. As you can see, I have my hands full. Some spoilers below on various shows...

The Walking Dead-So much misguided anger this season! And I want them to take baths. I've been around West Georgia and there are TONS of creeks and lakes. No reason to be filthy. Also, I might be late to the game, but as I watched the first episode of Season 3, I couldn't help but think...."OH...so THE Main Characters are the walking dead..."
666 Park Avenue-If LOST, American Horror and Gossip Girl had a baby it would be this show.
American Horror Story-Since so many shows have come back this season causing "meh" reactions, I gotta say I'm glad AHS is attempting a different storyline altogether. And wow, they are off to a great start!
Dexter-I always thought the show should END with Deb finding out about Dexter, so now that we've crossed that bridge I'm a little indifferent about things at the moment. Where is this gonna go?

New York.

SVU-Mariska Hargitay. Enough said.
Scandal-I am so conflicted over this show in so many ways. But I will stick around cause I love old Shonda.
Homeland-This is what Scandal wishes it were.
Revenge-I have never LOVED a Season 1 so much only to hate Season 2 so much. Get it together!
Grey's Anatomy-Have I mentioned that this needs to be the last season? Cause it needs to be. I hear Neve Campbell is coming on...NO NO NO, no more new people...wind it down please.
Parenthood-Best. Show. On. TV.
Nashville-Connie Britton was fabulous, and even though the 10 months I spent in Nashville weren't great, this makes me want to go back a give it another try. Plus...I mean, it's about music!
SmashI was hate-watching this show last season, and I will do the same this time around.
Glee-When Glee gets emotional, so do I. The Break-Up episode was Glee at its finest. More character building, less cheesy plot please.
Once Upon A Time-Again, strong Season 1, but this time around it's just losing steam.

Long Island

SNL-Sure it's all political at the moment, but soon it might find a nice retreat back into the relevant references of pop-culture. Best skit so far was either Bond Girls or Tech Talk.
30 Rock-I'm a fan in every since of the word. I will miss them after this season!
The Office-Dying a slow and painful death...
Community-I am cynical that without Dan Harmon it will be any good, but when done well, this show is pretty close to perfect. Oh...IF IT EVER COMES ON AGAIN!
Parks and Recreation-Thank God for Ron Swanson, Donna and April!
Up All Night-I am really rooting for this one, but I need more Maya and Christina interaction.
Raising Hope-This is so underrated, but it really delivers every week consistently.

Brooklyn

Two Broke Girls-Ok...so this is my "sleeper hit" of the year. My friend Joni was watching and told me to check it out. I fully expected to hate it. It has a laugh track, manufactured banter, and lots of sexual innuendo. And yet, I LOVE IT. The girls are adorable and the set up of the show is clever.
Modern Family-Another consistently strong show.
The Neighbors-Don't judge me...but this show is really cute. Yes, there are aliens, but I have been showing it to my Chinese students and they LOVE it.
The New Normal-Ryan Murphy, creator of Glee, American Horror Story, and Nip/Tuck, kind of took a few characters and plots from a few different shows and mixed them into this one. It's working, but I don't think it will last too long. Still, I like it enough.

That's at least 20 hours of TV a week. I will probably add Criminal Minds, Body of Proof, Gossip Girl, and sprinkle in some Real Housewives (New Jersey and New York) here and there. And I would LIKE to start on How I Met Your Mother, Gilmore Girls, and Downton Abbey.

I guess you could say, I watch TV like it's my job.

How many hours a week do you watch? BE HONEST!

How NOT To Be On Nancy Grace

I've been watching a lot of crime shows lately. Criminal Minds, Law and Order (SVU), and I am considering starting...(swallow) Castle. Even though I think it's a campy rip off of Moonlighting and the premise itself is ridiculous. A writer being allowed to "help" solve cases! Yeah right. 


It's impossible to watch these shows and manage to avoid seeing the similarities to real life famous cases. There are constant comparisons between the fictional crimes they are investigating to those of high profile cases of the past 50 years. When I think of these media storms, one name comes to mind...Nancy Grace.

You do NOT want to cross this woman. 

Nancy Grace isn't kidding around. Her most recent rampage was directed at Casey Anthony, who was on trial for the murder of her daughter. She is famous for her thick southern accent that delivers her rhetorical and over the top verbal beatings, and of course the entertainment value of her rants. She likes to promote that she is concerned with victim's rights, and often creates more drama than is necessary surrounding any given case. It's working for her. The bottom line is that she is very concerned with making sure criminals get what's coming to them and that victims get vindicated.


A friend of mine suggested the other day that I write a blog about Nancy Grace and these crime shows I've been watching. (I love blog suggestions.) I wasn't sure where to start though.


Criminal Minds, SVU, and other crime dramas are enjoyable to watch because they are formulaic. Watch them enough and you start to get the timing down, you realize that defining lines get said at the same time by the same character in each episode, you start to pick up on whether or not the victim will live or die, and whether or not the criminal will be convicted, captured, or escape. It's a 40 minute roller coaster that you've ridden before. That's part of the fun of these shows. You come in watching what would ordinarily be a terrifying situation but because you've figured out the formula, you feel like you have a sense of power over it.  


I have no idea if these situations translate to real life, but based on what I have seen in my last few weeks of crime drama, I've compiled two lists of ways to avoid having your name come out of Nancy Grace's mouth. Because whether you're the bad guy or the victim, it's just a good idea to avoid being mentioned on her show.


How NOT to be a victim:
Don't go jogging.
Don't even wear work out clothes.
Don't be a blonde.
Don't have hair at all.
Don't be a kid.
If you have to be a kid, leash yourself to your parents.
If you leash yourself to your parents, make sure they are not crazy.
Don't live in the suburbs.
Don't live in the midwest.
Don't go from one room to another in your house.
If you go from one room to another, don't look in the mirror when you get to the second room.
Don't be rich.
Don't drink wine.


How NOT to be a bad guy:
Don't have access to a dungeon, a concrete hole, or any dark damp place.
Don't be anti-social.
Don't be a momma's boy.
Don't have daddy issues.
If you do have any issues, resolve them ASAP.
Don't have a nagging wife who tries to control you.
Don't own random tools.
Don't own a truck or a van.
Don't wear black.
Don't wear boots.
Don't get bullied as a child.
If you do get bullied, channel your anger into being the next Steve Jobs.
Don't be overly religious.


And in the spirit of staying out of all kinds of trouble, here are the famous words of 30 Rock's Jack Donaghy...

What's your plan for avoiding attention from Nancy Grace?