So You Finished Season 3 of Downton Abbey...

First of all...welcome. I've been expecting you. Having sat quietly on that horrific ending of Season 3 for the last 2 months, I can honestly say that it's been tough watching your Facebook posts of celebration over marriages, babies, Bates' freedom, and Thomas not being a complete asshat. But alas, the celebration is over.

Matthew is dead.

Wait, I think I saw him breathe!

I've seen lots of anger at Julian Fellowes on Facebook and received quite a few texts regarding this most recent plot twist turn dead end. And it is in fact, tragic and maybe a bit reactionary. But my questions are not for Fellowes, they're for Dan Stevens.

What kind of guiding principles do you have that lead you away from THE most watched show in PBC history? Stevens insists he has other things coming down the pipe, some stage shows in New York, some writing opportunities, maybe a movie or two. He swears that he didn't want to be just the next big TV star. But my gut says he just put a nail in the coffin of his short-lived stardom.

The NICEST thing Fellowes could have done for him was to kill him off, because it keeps us sympathetic for him. Had Matthew left Mary, we would HATE him. Plot-wise it had to happen that way. Mary has a son, Matthew is practically Judas...serving his poetic purpose in a much larger story.

Ok, let's do this, I have to make a stop by Downton Abbey for what is basically becoming a British Horror Story.

Stevens' decision to leave goes directly against something I recently read from Tina Fey that I have adopted into my own guiding philosophy. Fey says:

The fun is always on the other side of a yes. Say yes, and you'll figure it out afterward. This has helped me to be more adventurous. It has definitely helped me be less afraid.

"We're offering you a job here at 'Saturday Night Live' -- can you move here within a week?"

"Ummm, yes I can."

"You know, you haven't been here that long, but do you want to move up and try to be one of the head writers?"

Feeling completely terrified inside, but saying, "Uhhh, yes, okay, yes, for sure."

"Do you wanna do 'Weekend Update' with Jimmy?"

Petrified. "Yes, thank you, of course!"

There are limits of reason to this idea of saying yes to everything, but when I meet someone whose first instinct is "No, how can we do that? That doesn't seem possible," I'm always kind of taken aback. Almost anyone would say, "It's Friday at two in the morning. We don't have an opening political sketch. We can't do it." Yeah, of course you can. There's no choice. And even if you abandon one idea for another one, saying yes allows you to move forward. 

I remember observing the tendency people have to say "no" first when I was on staff at a church. No matter what was thrown out as a new idea, the fact it was new meant that there was built-in resistance. I was disgusted that our members and staff were investing themselves by thinking about the church and trying to make it better, only to be shut down around every corner. Fey's advice and experience resonates with me on a very personal level. Saying "no" guarantees one thing...that nothing changes. You stay as poor, as rich, as successful, as stuck, as happy, and as depressed as you are at that moment. A yes, guarantees movement every time.

Does this look like the face of the next big superstar?

Steven's might get by for a few more years on his floppy blonde hair and his sultry eyes, but I find it hard to believe that he will ever compete with the likes of Channing Tatum and Ryan Gosling  on the big screen. I understand the concept of "leave 'em wanting more" but I also understand the concept of job security and being the most adored character on a super popular TV show. Ok...I don't understand that last part at all, but man...if I did, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't say no.

How long can Downton go on like this? Who will leave next? Why is this happening!? IS THIS REAL LIFE!!!???

 

21 Reasons The World Did Not End Yesterday

All is calm, all is right.

The world NEEDS to see Amy Poehler and Tina Fey host the Golden Globes.

I still believe there is redemption somewhere down the line for Lindsay Lohan.

Knowing whether Daryl Dixon survives the Governor/Zombie Apocalypse will give us all a glimpse into whether or not we actually stand a chance when if it happens.

There’s a royal baby coming!

More Honey Boo Boo please.

My Verizon contract still has a year to go. God forbid I terminate it early.

All those Americans are waiting on Downton Abbey Season 3. 

You procrastinated on buying Christmas gifts thinking the world might end. Cruel joke...now get going!

The last Olympic Games we see should not be London’s.

There are still children for Brad and Angelina to adopt.

We still don’t know who the mother of Ted’s children are.

There are so many more things to do on my bucket list.

If we’re going out, it’s gonna be death by zombies, not Mayan calendar mistakes.

I want to see Notre Dame pull an upset and beat Bama.

Who am I kidding, Bama is gonna win and once again prove that the SEC rules.

It’s time to actually MAKE the things I’ve pinned on Pinterest.

I still have to finish my book.

I need to see Jessica Lange kick some ass on American Horror Story.

I kinda want to see Dexter get what’s coming to him.

I still hold out hope that one day Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds will get married!

No one can know the hour...

If I Ever Lose My Faith In You

Get up right now. Well, not right this second. Finish reading this paragraph first. But when you're done, go to the nearest mirror. Look in it and ask yourself to remember deep down the most horrible thing you've done. I find that most of my most horrible things involve hurting other people. But there are others too. Maybe your worst things are lies. Judgment. Maybe you're a bully, or manipulative or maybe your selfish actions drive people away from you. Think deep down about the very worst thing about you, the thing you have a hard time telling anyone or admitting to yourself. Say it out loud. Say, "One time I......" Say "I am......" Come on, say it, admit it.

Did you do it? Did you admit that you are capable of bad, wrong, hurtful things? Ok. Now let's make a connection....If you are capable of these types of things, do you believe that anyone is? I know your tendency might be to think the best of people, I used to have that too. My parents even had sweet words about my belief that people are basically good printed in my high school yearbook beside my picture my Senior year because it was so defining of who I was then. And still, today, I want to believe the best in people. But I know what I'm capable of. And if I am capable of what I'm capable of...having no traumatic history, being surrounded by great, loving, and supportive parents, a fabulous network of friends, and the values and virtues of faith instilled in me from early on...then I believe we are probably all capable of less than good things. We do bad, dishonorable, hurtful, things on purpose sometimes, and then sometimes we just make mistakes.

So the question is...WHY ARE WE EVER SURPRISED when someone else does it? Two things have popped up in the news this week that have made me ask this question.

The first is about Billy Graham's alleged endorsement of Mitt Romney. I use the term "alleged endorsement" because it seems practically impossible to find what actually went down during said endorsement. BUT...before his meeting with Romney, Graham defined Mormonism as a cult; however, somewhere in the last few weeks that opinion has changed and his website no longer has this definition listed. Now, I personally don't want my religion and state to interact at all, so this is not a statement on that. It's a statement about a Christian leader who has been held up as the pillar of the faith, put on a pedestal for many years, changing his opinion, loosening up his stand, or just abandoning his convictions in his old age, and in turn, causing the Christian community to begin to either question what they once held true, or be questioned about said beliefs. Somewhere along the way, Graham became the walking representative of Evangelical Christians, and so goes Graham, so goes Evangelical Christians. Which is great...until it's not.

The second instance is that of Lance Armstrong and his drug induced wins. The iconic "LiveStrong" paraphenelia is now being dismissed as "LieStrong." And all the cancer survivors and athletes and dreamers who thought he was borderline superhuman are now let down. He's a professional athlete! What do we know about professional athletes? That the majority of them that seem superhuman end up revealing drug usage. And yet people are waiting in the wings to rip up his success, giving up on their own dreams because what was once thought possible is now just a shade of the real story.

We have these cultural icons that we rely on for different things, and when they fall, often whatever hope, whatever faith we have put into them, whatever groups of people allow themselves to be represented, fall with them. Let's explore some others just for fun. Mind you, I am in no way trying to pick on these people. I am only attempting to show a pattern that exists in our pop-culture.

Rock Hudson-Back in his day, Hudson was the walking fantasy of most women. Until they found out he was gay. They had to come to terms that a man who had been the dream of every woman, didn't even really like women. Minds and hearts blown.

Marilyn Monroe, Elvis, and any other Celebrity Suicide-You have to ask yourself if fame drives people to suicide or if people who are more apt to be famous have a predisposition to depression. Whatever the answer is, for anyone who has ever had a favorite celebrity kill themselves/overdose, it's devastating every time. Because you see those people as strong, as iconic and having it all together, or at least having the resources to have it all together! If they, with all their money, all their dreams having come true, if they can't make it, who can? Only the good die young seems to be more of a promise than a suggestion.

Teenage Idols-The second Miley Cyrus posed practically nude, it's like every parent in America went crazy. Hannah Montana should be fully clothed spouting off silly jokes in a borderline disrespectful tone to her father, not wearing sheets that barely cover up her bathing suit parts for Annie Leibovitz! Miley followed in the footsteps of Britney and LiLo saying, "I never asked to be a role model." And it's true...they didn't But parents invested thousands of dollars into concert tickets, t-shirts, cd's and more to attach their child with a girl maturing in a celebrity world, and then when she actually did as celebrities do, they were surprised. How about this...moms, you be your daughter's hero, or encourage her to be her own!

Oprah-Oprah has let people down in lots of ways. She's been too white for the black community, too black for the white community. Too rich for the poor community. Too new age for the religious community, too religious for the new age community. Too cold hearted, too sentimental. Too fat for the thin community, and then too thin for the fat community, and then all sizes lost hope when she gained the weight back again. The lesbian community was disappointed to find that she and Gayle are just friends, and the marriage advocates were frustrated by her lack of official commitment to Stedman. Even those people who got free cars had to pay taxes on the cars which pissed them off. This woman can't win, and yet, she totally does. I guess there's something to be said for just being yourself no matter what that means.

When I started this blog and asked you to remind yourself of the worst things you've done...I wasn't trying to shame you into some level of admittance or guilt wallowing, I was trying to remind you that you're human, and so are the people that carry the burdens of our expectations. Which, is why we probably shouldn't put them on people....even famous ones.

Unless that person is Tina Fey. I mean, what could she possibly do wrong? ;)

Which political figures, cultural icons, and celebrities 

have shocked or let you down? 

When You're The Best Of Friends!

The squeal I let out when I heard that Amy Poehler and Tina Fey will host the Golden Globes together was something similar to the night my high school boyfriend kissed me in my front yard while my friends watched from inside. I ran back inside to celebrate with them and lots of squealing happened. Yes, I used to squeal about boys and kisses.

But this post is not about that. Because no matter how great that kiss was, the part I remember being the most fun was the celebration inside with my friends. We'd heard from someone (this was before anyone was googling to fact check) that being french kissed turned your tongue white. We all ran into the tiny bathroom in my house, and I stuck out my tongue to see if it was true. Funny thing, it wasn't even my first real kiss. But this one held a different level of excitement because my friends were there for it. Oh, and I'm pretty sure my tongue was pink.

I'm very aware that my brand of friendship might be quite different than yours. Maybe it comes from being single for so long, but I think it's fair to say, I've always had a deep love for friends. My mother has amazing friends who were "other mothers" to me, and I think she stressed the importance of friendship as much as she did independence and putting on deodorant. I remember hearing "boys will come and go, but friends will stay forever." I mean, in retrospect, that's a little idealistic. I've had lots of friends come and go too. But on the whole...my friends have really been there. And I have THEEEEE most amazing friends.

Friendship doesn't just hold up as legit for us real people, it also seems to be able to survive the fame and fortune of Hollywood. I think this is because if you are rich and important, recognized around every corner, and you actually find someone who you can trust and who will love you for who you are without make-up, you probably hang onto them.

So, in celebration of what is bound to be the BEST Golden Globes EVER, and in celebration of friendship...here are some notable Famous BFF's.

Bitches get stuff done.

Tina and Amy-The Funniest
The way Tina talks about Amy in her book Bossypants gives a real idea of the kind of support these two show each other. They have risen to stardom at the same time, and been active participants in their individual successes. Recently at a charity auction they put a night of being their BFF up on the auction block and two women wrote checks for $36,000 each. I want to go to there.

Sense and sensibility.

Kate and Reese-The Ones I Want To Know
When Kate Winslet moved in next to Reese Witherspoon, she came over to say hi one night. As they talked about possible playdates for their kids, Kate told Reese she hadn't had anything to drink and asked if she had wine. Of course Reese did, and their friendship was born over wine and conversation that night. You all know Kate is my favorite actress, and Reese is from the South...I love this pairing so much!

Oprah and Gayle-The Real Deal
You can't even mention BFF's in Hollywood without thinking of these two. When I think about the success Oprah has had, in all reality, Gayle is probably the only person in her life that she can truly trust. Watching them on their road trip was hilarious because they fight like sisters! And their camping trip at Yosemite. Best ever.

There is no me without you.

Busy and Michelle-The Soulmates
Seriously, this might seem like a strange combo, but these two have been friends for a long time. Through all the tragedy of Heath Ledger's death and the celebration of having babies. They are seen together all the time, and apparently some people question the proclaimed platonic nature of their friendship. They make no bones about calling each other soul mates and admit having "girl crushes" on each other. But those who know them or spend time around them just say that they are seriously the best of friends, in ways that you can only understand if you've had this kind of best friend.

Dakota and Kristen-The Opposites
Um. What? They're best friends? In my mind, Dakota is still sweetly knitting things on talk shows, while KStew is busy...well, stewing. This friendship alone is proof that opposites attract not only in romance, but in friendship.

Everyone just calm down.

Penelope and Salma-The Sexiest
This is too much sexy in a friendship. I mean, somebody has to be the Rhoda.

The Threesomes
There are some internet discrepancies over these next few people. It's bound to happen. There's always that poor woman who thinks that she is her BFF's, BFF, but has no idea that her BFF has another BFF. I think that's what's happening in some of these situations. Which of these pairings do you think is the real deal?

Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz or Drew Barrymore and Ellen Page
Their birthdays are 1 day and...er...a few years apart. Seriously, even with a 12 year age difference, I have to vote for Ellen and Drew on this one. Mainly because I cannot imagine anyone ever being best friends with Cameron Diaz. Except maybe Scarlett Johannsen.

Shenanigans.

Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox Arquette or Jennifer Aniston and Chelsea Handler
As much as we all want Rachel and Monica to be friends forever, there are rumors that they've suffered some rough spots in the last year or so. Meanwhile, Chelsea loves to mention Jennifer on her show and reference their nights out. I am sure that Courtney has the staying power in this, but I do think that Jenn needs a friend who will go to the mat for her. Chelsea doesn't take shit off of anyone, and for that reason, I like the thought of the two of them as best friends.

Even at my worst, I'm best with you.

Kate Hudson and Liv Tyler or Kate Hudson and Ginnifer Goodwin
FALSE. There is no right answer to this, because in spite of both Liv and Ginnifer seemingly being wonderful people, they are obviously HORRIBLE friends because they let Kate do this:

I have no real friends.

Talk to me about BFF's...

Who did I leave out that's worth mentioning? 

Who will never have one? 

Which celeb do you want to be BFF with?

Happy Birthday Elizabeth Stamatina Fey!!!

What the what!

Today is the birthday of one of my favorite celebrities, Tina Fey! Sometimes I try to think about what my life was like before Tina was a part of my weekly routine. But those kinds of thoughts are really not worth my time. And anyway, I'm certain I was depressed back then. But not anymore. Before I moved to China for the year, I decided to invest in 1 TV series on iTunes. I landed on 30 Rock. I have been here for 3 months, and I've seen the first 5 seasons about 5 times through so far. Never. Gets. Old.


I could seriously geek out over Tina Fey to a point that anyone reading this might:
A. Think I need a life
B. Think I should be locked up
C. Fear for Tina Fey's life


Not only is Tina an incredible comedy/television writer, but her book, Bossypants is seriously one of the greatest things I have ever read. Or heard. (I recommend the audiobook so you can hear her read it.) Fey's impression of Palin will outlast Palin herself. She is an endearing advocate for social equality. She is humble, giving others credit for her success, she is focused on what matters in life, and she stays out of the tabloids. I could go on and on about my admiration for this woman, but at the risk of sounding a little too obsessed, I will just give you a recount of my personal favorite Liz Lemon moments. No matter how obscure they might be!


1. Season 5: Episode: It's Never Too Late For Now
Not only is this one of the BEST 30 Rock Episodes, it also contains one of my favorite Liz moments. Spinster Liz comes to work with a sweatshirt on, a fanny pack, her hair pulled back with a chip clip, and a cat. She announces that she has named her cat, Emily Dickinson, and as the writers groan, she repeats, "NAMED HER EMILY DICKINSON" over their objections. Most of my cats have had literary names. I get this.


2. Season 5: Episode: Brooklyn Without Limits
The connectivity of this episode to the world of capitalism that we live in today made it so much more fun to watch. Liz finds the perfect pair of jeans and insists she will wear them out of the store. When the clerk asks her what she wants to do with her old jeans, she says, "Burn Them. BURRRRNNN THEM!" We've all been there.


3. Season 3: Episode: Jackie Jormp-Jomp 
Liz is suspended from work for sexual harassment, and in her time off gets mixed up with a group of women who spend their days doing pilates, drinking wine, getting massages, shopping, and lunching. Before long her days start to blur together and she decides that this life is the life she wants to live instead of her normally obsessed-with-work life. At one point in the show she says to the women, "Eating right, working out, sleeping. Boy, is anyone else BMing like a rock star?" It's not long before Liz discovers that the group of women are actually a fight club. At this realization she says, "Ahhh. This is very disappointing!" A few minutes later she is back at work with a black eye. The fun of this episode is seeing Liz out of her element.


4. Season 4: Episode: Future Husband
Liz has had oral surgery and wakes up to find a toaster waffle in her DVD player. She calls Jack and he informs her that she was a little out of it and "watched it for about an hour, said Nicole Kidman should get an oscar for it then you turned it off...You kept trying to order home massages off of Craig's List." Just then a knock at Liz's door and someone says in a deep scary voice, "Hey, somebody order a massage?" Liz responds in the most ridiculous accent, "You're too late, I already killed her!" Hilarious.


5. Season 2: Episode: Jack Gets in the Game
Jack has had a secret heart attack and can no longer eat red meat. He calls Liz to his office and offers her a steak. She thanks him and tells him that it will make a great sandwich, then he explains that she must eat it in front of him. She says, "You want to watch me eat this steak in front of you?" Jack says, "That's what I want." Liz shrugs, and says, "Ok." A few minutes later, Jack has given one of his thoughtful monologues while pacing in his office, and as he turns, he sees the steak is gone. Liz is chewing. Shocked, he says, "You ate that whole thing!?" Still chewing she looks around and says, "A dog took it...he came out of nowhere." Comedy Gold.


Honorable mentions: 


Anytime Liz slaps Kenneth, which happens a lot more than you realize until you've seen the show on repeat for 3 months.


Anytime Liz mentions food.


Anytime Liz says "Shut it down."


Any flashback to a Liz of the past.

What's your favorite thing about Tina Fey 

or your favorite Liz Lemon moment???

Somebody Bring Me Some Ham!!!

Liz's ode to Meat Cat

I want to be Liz Lemon. Since I cannot be her, I would settle for marrying her. Since she only has eyes for Beeper Kings and Astronaut Mike Dexter, I wouldn't mind just bringing her a sandwich from time to time. Or everyday. 


And by Liz Lemon, I mean Tina Fey.