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September 18, 2012

I Got Weekend Fat on Garbage Snack Movies

I watched a lot of "new" movies this week. I'm still finishing Desperate Housewives, but sometimes I need a break. I can only describe a few of these movies in the same vein as this girl describes trying the new Candy Corn Oreos. Garbage Snacks. Which might be my new favorite term EVER.

They fought someone who was trying to destroy something.
The Avengers:
Maybe I'm just late to the game on this, but I was bored. Which made me really disappointed. You guys KNOW how I love Superhero movies! What I learned in this movie was that I love the part of those movies when they are discovering their new powers, but when they already have them, it's kind of boring. Plus...what is Scarlett's power? Whoring around? And has Mark Ruffalo ever lost his temper a day in his life?  Anyway, I hung in there through the whole thing, but I'm not gonna lie, I checked out from time to time, and that's unusual. Feel free to talk me into watching a second time. I would be up for it, if you can convince me.
Strings Attached.
Jane Eyre:
One of the ways I love to connect with people is to watch the same movies. Last week, a friend of mine happened to have this recorded so I decided to watch "with" her, and sure enough the Chinese Internet Gods provided the movie! I've heard about Jane Eyre my entire life, but honestly, I just lumped her into that category of movie that I hate. I can see why Jane Eyre is considered a heroine of sorts. She pushes past a traumatic history and comes out on the other side. Her love runs deep. But this particular movie was hard to buy. The woman playing Jane looks like a child. And Michael Fassbender...does not. It held my interest, and was a pretty straightforward story. It lacks the cleverness of Austen's plots (yes, I just gave her credit), but I can see redeeming qualities. If any of you out there LOVE Jane Eyre, please, send me your explanation/defense of it. I need to be convinced.
What's your favorite meta movie?
The Cabin In The Woods:
Um. Ok. So...a meta "horror" movie. Love the concept. And I think I enjoyed the subtle (sometimes too subtle) shout outs to horror films and film-makers from the past. But....ugh! It's like, didn't Scream already meta the horror movie genre before meta was even a thing? With the exception the two teenage hunks (a Hemsworth brother and Jesse Williams!) the rest of what's good about this movie happens in the lab. The idea that you could manipulate a game-like horror movie, with the entire staff making bets on what will happen and celebrating accordingly is kind of fun. But at some point this movie goes beyond meta, beyond horror, and just gets so far over the top. I feel the same way about this that I felt about Black Swan. SO MUCH POTENTIAL. And yet, the overtness, the beating us over the head with the point kind of made it fall short for me.
A real human being...and a real hero?
Drive:
I have never been so conflicted over a movie before. I watched it twice this week and assigned it to several of my friends to watch so that I could decide whether or not I liked it through talking it out with them. Here's what's up. Ryan Gosling and Carey Mulligan are amazing. Their chemistry is adorable/sexy in this movie. I thought this was going to be a movie about a man who drives a "get away" car, and that's how it starts. Gosling is perfect for that. His face is perfect for holding tension. But where the movie goes is surprising and a little frustrating. At times it felt like it was trying to be True Romance. It felt like it was trying to be 80's. It felt like it was trying. And maybe that's the thing that kept me from loving it. Critics have described it as a movie for hipsters, but who can even know...not like they would admit to liking it. And yet...even with my wavering opinion, I still think you should see it.

Have you seen any of these? What did you think? 

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